Truth, Dare, or Nightmare
by Lugia's Apprentice
Summary: I don't see a lot of Legendary truth or dares, so here I go...
1. Let the Games Begin

Me: Hallo, peoples! Welcome to my first Truth or Dare Fanfic: Truth, Dare, or Nightmare! I'll be having all your fave (or least fave) legendary Pokémon do whatever dares your evil little minds come up with. Here's the catch: they can refuse, but if they do, Darkrai here will hit them with Dark Void, forcing them into their worst nightmare! Say hi, Darkrai.

Darkrai: Hello, readers. This means I can't be dared, right?

Me: Nope. You have it just as bad as anyone else, depending on the reviews.

Darkrai: …f**k.

Me: Darn it, Darkrai! I was going for a swearless Fanfic! Into the fangirl pit with you! (dropkicks Darkrai into pit full of fangirls)

Darkrai: AAAH! NOT FANGIRLS! HELP MEEEEE!

Fangirls: SQUEEE! DARKRAI!

Me: New rule: anytime someone swears at the author, they are thrown to the fangirls.

-Five minutes later-

Me: OK, time's up. (poofs Darkrai back)

Darkrai: (whimpering) Please don't do that again…

Me: Just do your dares, and all will be well.

Darkrai: Is it too late to leave?

Me: Yep.

Darkrai: …darn.

Me: That's better. Oh, I almost forgot. (transforms into a dark blue Vaporeon with purple eyes and black chest fur.) Ah, much better.

Darkrai: 0.0

Me: And now, our feature presentation. (poofs all Legendaries inside massive room) Nothing happens yet, because I R HAZ NO REVIEWZ! (goes elsewhere to binge on fudge)

Darkrai: Not to sound like a typical helper, but please review so our Author will leave some fudge for me. Leave some dares too, or else he'll get bored and put me in the pit again…

Me: I HEARD THAT! (poofs Darkrai back into the fangirl pit)

Darkrai: NOT AGAIN! (gets mauled by fangirls)

Me: He stays there until I get some reviews! (goes back to fudge nomming)


	2. The Part Where I Torture Them

Me: YAYZ! I R HAZ DAREZ! Oop, hold on. (poofs Darkrai back)

Darkrai: Why did you do that? I didn't do anything wrong.

Me: Meh, I needed a bargaining tool. Also, I shall be known as the Apprentice until the end of the Fanfic. P.S.: I don't own Pokémon or the Force, just myself.

Darkrai: OK. By the way, I found these reviews in the pit. I think they were written by fangirls.

Apprentice: BY FANGIRLS?! (Hydro Pumps paper out of Darkrai's hand, torches it with a flamethrower, and buries it SEVEN feet under.) Mewtwo, spit on it for good measure.

Mewtwo: (in a bad mood) Be silent or face my wrath!

Apprentice: (looks ticked off) I give the orders here, Forever A Clone. (zaps Mewtwo with Force Lightning)

Mewtwo: (in extreme pain) OW! OW! OK, I'LL DO IT! OWOWOW!

Apprentice: (stops the lightning) And do not question me again!

Mewtwo: (spits on hole)

Apprentice: Good. Darkrai, have some fudge.

Darkrai: YAY! (noms fudge)

Apprentice: Would you mind reading the dares? I don't have thumbs.

Darkrai: Then how did you use Force Lightning?

Apprentice: Author Magic.

Darkrai: 0.0 Oookaay… Anyway, here's our first review, from someone going by the name of Poor Bob. Hi Bob, and thanks!

Kyogre- Teach Groudon to swim

Rayquaza- Let Groudon and Kyogre beat you up.

Reshiram and Zekrom- Are you racist?

Apprentice: Ooooh, good ones! Let's begin!

Kyogre: There is absolutely no way I'm-

Darkrai: (holds up dark energy threateningly)

Kyogre: (thoughtful) Hmmm… I can obey, teach Groudon to swim, suffer his wrath and go to war with him, crushing countless innocent lives, or I can refuse, giving myself up for the good of the many…

Apprentice: Hurry up! We've got other dares to get to THIS CHAPTER!

Kyogre: YOU ARE DELIBERATELY TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY GOOD NATURE! F**K YOU!

Apprentice: I was just going to throw you into the nightmares, but it seems you have other ideas. (uses Force Grip to drop Kyogre into the fangirl pit)

Kyogre: (gasps) NOOOOO!

Apprentice (in ominous voice) And so another enemy of the Empire falls…

Mew: What empire?

Apprentice: I'm ignoring you. Onto the next dare!

Rayquaza: But you can't have them beat me up! Kyogre's getting mauled by fangirls! HA!

Apprentice: The power of fangirls is insignificant compared to the power of an Author.

Entei: What's with all the Star Wars quotes?

Apprentice: What's wrong with Star Wars? I LIKE Star Wars.

Raikou: Entei, you're being a short-sighted fool. If you anger the Apprentice, he'll kill us all!

Apprentice: I WILL NOT! Although I have to admit quoting Jetfire there was pretty epic. Raikou, have a brownie. Entei, TO THE NIGHTMARE!

Raikou: YAY! (noms brownie)

Entei: NOOOOO! (goes to Darkland, or wherever the heck Darkrai takes you)

Apprentice: Back to what I was doing before. (poofs pink Kyogre to the stage) Alright Rayquaza, Dare or Nightmare?

Rayquaza: (grumbling) Dare. AAAAAH! NO GROUDON! I NEED THAT SPLEEN! AAAAAH!(continues to get raged upon by Kyogretwo and Groudon)

Apprentice: Wow. Snakes ARE spineless. Next!

Reshiram: (angrily) Of course not! I would never discriminate!

Apprentice: Zekrom, what about you?

Zekrom: Actually, yes. Every black guy I've ever known has been a complete jerk!

Apprentice: (facepalms) Zekrom, you ARE black!

Zekrom: …well, s**t.

Apprentice: I'd have thought that Darkrai would have taught you better. TO THE FANGIRLS!

Zekrom: Oh well. I wonder how many I have.

Apprentice: 0.0 (grabs Zekrom's leg in his teeth, drags him into the fangirl pit, and trots out completely unharmed. Because Vaporeon is just that awesome.)

Fangirls: (attack Zekrom for being a Rayquaza rip-off)

Apprentice: That's that. Remember, the sooner you review, the sooner everyone escapes the fangirl pit!


	3. Gameshows and Falcons

Apprentice: It continues! (revives all Pokémon. Kyogretwo disappears) Dare time! This one was submitted by my first follower, Mage of Breath. Thanks for your support!

Disclaimer: I don't own Pokémon or Captain Falcon.

Ho-Oh, Victini, Palkia, and Entei- do a game show involving wits. The winner gets a special prize!

Apprentice: Since I don't know how to run a game show, I'll do a simple quiz show. DON'T FLAME ME! Contestants, are you ready?

Ho-Oh, Victini, Entei, and Palkia: Yes.

Apprentice: (poofs tuxedo for himself) Here we go! Question 1- What is the strongest Type?

Victini: Psychic!

Entei: Dragon!

Palkia: Water!

Ho-Oh: None!

Apprentice: DING! Ho-Oh is correct- there IS no strongest Type!

Scores

Ho-Oh-1

Everyone else-0

Apprentice: Question 2- If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?

Victini, Entei, and Palkia: No.

Ho-Oh: Yes.

Apprentice: Prove it.

Ho-Oh: Absol know when trees fall because they have visions, and in those visions there is sound. Absol hear the tree fall in their visions. Right, Absol?

Absol: Correct.

Apprentice: How did you even get in here? (reluctantly poofs Absol away)Anyway, Ho-Oh wins!

Ho-Oh: YAYZORZ! What do I win?

Apprentice: You get thrown to the fangirls with the Pokémon of your choice!

Ho-Oh: What? Why?

Apprentice: Because Mage of Breath told me so. Don't argue or I leave you there for an extra chapter.

Ho-Oh: (scared straight) I choose Victini.

Victini: Why me? I'm cute!

Apprentice: Maybe, but you're also a Mew rip-off. TO THE FANGIRLS! (gets Captain Falcon to Falcon Mega Punch Ho-Oh and Victini into the fangirl pit) I'm not writing in their screams, but they are screaming like girls. Just so you know. Review and maybe I'll have CF come back! (poofs CF away)


	4. Stupid Legendary vs MASHY-SPIKE-TEETH!

Apprentice: Welcome back! We've got some good dares for ya, so sit back, relax, and enjoy their pain. These were submitted by Heavy. Remember, it's him talking, not me!

Disclaimer: I don't own Pokémon.

Keldeo- Tell Groudon that he's fat.

Suicune- Beat Keldeo up for being a sucky Water-type Legend.

Latias- Slap 3 people of your choice.

Uxie- Punch yourself as hard as you can in the nuts. (If you have any)

Registeel- Eat some bacon.

Apprentice: (chuckles evilly) I love the way your foul little mind works! Keldeo!

Keldeo: (in a wussy voice) He's too scary!

Apprentice: Don't worry; you can't get hurt in a Fanfic…

Keldeo: OK! (to Groudon) You're so fat, Wailords call you Tubby!

Groudon: (eats Keldeo)

Apprentice: …unless I want you to. Heh heh heh heh…

Groudon: (pukes Keldeo up 'cuz he's a loser)

Apprentice: Suicune, it's your turn!

Suicune: I've always wanted to do this. HAVE AT YOU! (mauls Keldeo to death, then follows him into the Distortion World and kills his spirit)

Apprentice: Poor Keldeo. I hated him, Cobalion. Latias!

Latias: (slaps Ash) Poképhile! (slaps Latios) I told you not to waste your final life! (slaps Registeel) I hate you. Drop dead.

Registeel: PHYSICAL PAIN DETECTED. RECOMMENDATION: ASSIMILATE BACON. (eats bacon)

Apprentice: (confused) How did he do that? He doesn't even have a mouth!

Uxie: I'm genderless, so I don't have any.

Apprentice: Aaaand scene. Alright people, spot the reference!


End file.
